Proposed
by Diana52
Summary: Levi and Mikasa have a secret relationship, but during a mission Levi is lost. After several years of believing him to be dead, Mikasa is engaged to another. However things don't turn out as expected. RIVAMIKA. LEVIMIKA.
1. Chapter 1

**I have not caught up with the manga, so obviously there will be things in here that will not be cannon. So please keep that in mind. Thank you for reading this story and I hope you guys enjoy it.**

She was lost inside her head, thinking of things that were impossible. While simultaneously orgasming at the touch of the man who would soon be her husband. Her eyes were shut tight imagining those blue eyes that once haunted her. She would do anything to have them stare back at her, like they once did.

"You like that don't you?" his usual careful touch, was gone. His voice now rougher and greedy. Replaced by a desperate grip that pulled at her skin possessively almost as if he was trying to prevent her from leaving. Like he knew that her thoughts were elsewhere. He drove his hard erection into her throbbing core once more, eliciting a moan from her lips. She could feel his lips begin to move down her neck, while maintaining that agonizing rhythm that would surely drive her insane. "What did I ever do to deserve you?" he muttered under his moans.

Mikasa instinctively pulled back but she was already pinned to the wall, there was no going anywhere. He pulled back a bit, his breaths were heavy and needy for more of her. Her dark eyes opened only to meet the concerned gaze forrest green eyes. "Why'd you stop?" but she already knew why.

"Mikasa, did I hurt you or something?" His hands raised up attempting to caress her back, but she recoiled.

"I'm fine," an annoyed voiced that Mikasa wished she could have repressed. "That came out harsher than what I meant. It's just I was really close Eren. You shouldn't have stopped…" she hoped that lie would deceive him.

He gave small chuckle, "Why is it that every time I think I know what state of mind you're in, I always get it wrong somehow?" He took a step back, releasing her from his touch. "Mikasa, I love you." She attempted to smile, but her truth was present in her face. Worse of all, he saw it. Whatever she did next would be useless because he had seen past her facade.

"Eren I-" he interrupted.

"I didn't say it so that I could hear you repeat a lie to me." He turned around and began to walk towards the bed. Silence filled the room, Mikasa could feel her heart racing in her chest. All she wanted to do was to reassure him that she did in fact love him. However this would be difficult seeing as it would not be completely true. She didn't trust herself at the moment, so she remained quiet. Staring at him until sat on the bed and faced her direction once more. "Look its pretty late maybe we should call it a night," he sighed rubbing his temples. Frustration hanging prevalently in the room.

"Alright," she grabbed her clothes and began to redress. While he grabbed her bag, and followed her to the door. She sighed in resignation, "I'm sorry if I hurt you." she quietly whispered. Her eyes looked up him, but she could see the sorrow building up inside of them. She reached up to kiss his cheek. "I'll see you tomorrow."

The warm water of the bath tub reached her neck, and she sunk deep into the tub to fully emerge herself in the delight that was the feeling of warmth. ' _I should do this more often,'_ she thought. It had been a longtime since she had sneaked into the bathrooms this late at night. Usually if she got a chance to bathe it would have to be quick, but seeing as it was the middle of the night an nobody should interrupt her, Mikasa figured it was worth it.

Mikasa tried not to think about the sad gaze Eren left her, after her departure from his room. She tried to distance herself from that reality, a reality that would sooner or later crush her under its pressure. Instead like always her mind would race with the thoughts of her captain. How his pupils would dilate to the point of almost completely covering his blue iris, when he was about to cum. Or how he used to sneak into her room, when things at camp became too unbearable. In the end he was all she wanted, but that was not a reality she lived in. It hurt to even think it, but more than likely he was dead somewhere outside of Wall Maria. She would never get to properly mourn him, or even get to explain to her friends why in these last few years she had changed so much. She felt empty and alone. No one would ever know, and that hurt her more than anything a titan could do to her.


	2. Chapter 2

**So this going to be a flashback, from basically now until we catch up to chapter 1. Take it as Mikasa reflecting from the tub, I didn't know how to explain so I guessed this was the best way to do it. Thank you for reading, and please excuse any typos.**

 _Truth be told he gained her fury from the first moment they had ever met. Granted he could have made a better first impression, if he had refrained from beating her best friend to a pulp. She watched helplessly as Captain Levi struck Eren again and again. The only thing that prevented her from jumping down onto the center of the courtroom was Armin's tight grip on her arm. She had half a mind to kill the Captain right where he stood, if only she weren't surrounded by heads of the army. Mikasa's love for Eren trumped everything, but even she knew that the only outcome that would result from murdering that asshole of a Captain would be execution. It wasn't like she could deny it, basically everyone that surrounded her was an honorary/decorated soldier. Not to mention they would be direct witnesses to her crime. So like a proper soldier she sat back down and bit her tongue. Thankfully Captain Levi proved his point, even if it was at the cost of Eren's wellbeing. The Judge granted the Survey Corps custody of Eren._

 _At the time she did not know that this was the plan all along, but even after it had all been revealed she refused to forgive the Captain. She kept her distance and would only speak to him if he spoke to her first. They had a typical superior and subordinate relationship, with an underlying hatred that she kept hidden. She would often give him a cold shoulder, or on her meaner days she could get under his skin by purposely disorganizing his paper work, or hiding a small items from his office. She found it hilarious that Humanity's Strongest, could remain calm when he faced the worst of the titans, but if he saw something messy or unclean he would lose his cool. He never caught her, but she secretly ravished in his reactions._

 _For a few months they went on like that, that was until Annie. After the female titan killed hundreds of her fellow comrades, somehow Mikasa stupidly thought she could kill the beast and save Eren. All by herself. Luckily Captain Levi was there to stop her, if it wouldn't have been for him she would not only have lost Eren but also more than likely lost her life as well. Captain Levi risked his life for Eren, and in the process injured himself. All because she stubbornly decided to do the job on her own rather than wait for the rest of the squad. However she felt relieved that Eren was saved, but the guilt of hating a man she had gotten all wrong bothered her. It wasn't as if they had ever been close to one another before that, so she had never truly gotten to know him. This was the first time she had saw him do something completely reckless and stupid, all of it was because of her._

 _Mikasa could never accurately pinpoint when exactly she felt differently towards the Captain. In fact she was almost certain that she hated him for quite sometime. Those feelings lingering for quite a while. After Annie it was safe to say that their relationship took a sharp turn. Those feelings of hatred soon took the face of affection. She constantly had to stop herself from thinking about him, it definitely was not love (or so she would repeat to herself). However it was certainly no longer hate. Up until that point her only source of a reference regarding love was only Eren. For a while she considered him the love of her life, but that was something she would never reveal to anyone, not even him. It was pretty obvious that the love was only one sided, herself being the only one with romantic intentions._

 _But even then those feelings for Eren soon began to dwindle, something in her had definitely changed. After the whole Annie incident, it was safe to say that the entire corps had been rattled by the recent discoveries. She blamed her newfound emotions for the Captain on Annie and she reasoned that they would disappear with time. Instead she tried to focus on helping Eren recuperate, even though he was obviously in no need of her help. Eren titan form or whatever let him turn into a titan, also came along with some nice self healing abilities. Eren would be fine in a few days, but it wasn't his body Mikasa worried about; Rather it was his emotional state. His frustrations over finding out that Annie was a traitor only helped isolate him from her even more._

 _Eren might still deny any feelings for the female titan but Mikasa knew him better than he would ever know himself. She knew that the only reason why he hesitated when it came time to rip Annie to pieces when he had a chance was because he loved her. Even after they returned back to the castle with the rest of the corps, things never regained the same feeling as before. Eren became distant with her. She could feel him slipping through her fingers, and along with it the romantic feelings she had bottled up for the last couple of years. Everything seemed to be changing in her world, and there was nothing she could do to stop it._

 _Erwin never imagined that both the Garrison and the Military police would turn their backs on them, he especially resented that it was done so quickly. He had little time to prepare everyone for what was to come. Due to what had just occurred at Wall Cena, Commander Erwin was on constant leave. He was expected to meet with the other branches of the military to discuss any further plans regarding the Survey Corps. There was serious distrust throughout the walls, and the other military branches believed that the Corps was to blame for the Female titan incident. Which was absolutely absurd, but regardless the Commander obliged knowing that this was just a ploy to gather control of the movement that was uprising throughout the military. By keeping Erwin away they could halt any new discoveries that may persuade people into trying to find more questions. Since they could not win the argument fairly, they would cripple the movement slowly. The Survey Corps was placed under high supervision, everything the corps did was reviewed a confirmed by the other branches as well. Commander Erwin knew that if he disobeyed or tried to fight these new expectations, the Corps could be seen as a threat. This was not ideal, seeing as the Corps was already on thin ice. So until everything got sorted out the Corps would have to resign to headquarters, and accept what was to come. Commander Erwin left his position to both Hanji and Levi, they were to essentially to look after the place until he came back. Secretly Erwin had left instructions for the next operation, Hanji and Levi were to make the necessary preparations for it in secret as well as prepare everyone for what was to come. Mikasa knew that their Commander would not sit idly by while the Military police and Garrison got away with their cowardliness. If they didn't want to fight it would be up to the Survey Corps to throw the first punch for humanity._

 _Mikasa admired that about the Commander, he was a man who was so taken over by a mission that he would do whatever it took to make it happen. He reminded her or Eren in someways. Both were crazy to an extent, but both strived for humanity to survive. However this new obstacle proved to be one that would be difficult. The Survey Corps as they knew it soon began failing apart at the seams, while Hanji and Levi transitioned as best they could it was quite obvious that there were problems. Little things would become big problems, and this was quite visible on the two. While Hanji was originally delighted to take the position, Levi only saw it as a favor for a dear friend. The captain began to wither away, and almost everyone could see it. He lost weight, and became even paler than what he already was. The usual bags under his eyes became darker, it was painfully obvious that he was not sleeping. While Hanji, basically controlled daily operations, and training exercises. Levi was left in charge of all of the paperwork which included the ordering of supplies and food to reports. Reports that only warranted more specificity from the other branches. He refused help from anybody, and while most of the cadets chose to just ignore the obvious struggle of the Captain, Mikasa could not get it out of her head. To make things worse Captain Levi had not yet recovered from his leg injury. Maybe if he had been in his full health, he would have been in a better condition to take on so much work. After all it was her fault, if she had listened to him and taken Eren away from the female titan instead of trying to kill her, Captain Levi would have never received such an injury. She owed him the decency to help him, if there was a way she could._

 _At first she reasoned with herself that she would only ask, and if he said no she would leave. In all fairness what she also wanted an alleviation from the guilt she had within in her. She thought that by asking him, those feelings would disappear. She did not expect to be so frustrated by his complete and dismissive refusal. Mikasa Ackerman would not take no for an answer no matter what he said. So whether he wanted it or not she would help ease some tension somehow._

 _—_

 _"Captain, you can whine and moan all you want, I am not leaving without an acceptance." Mikasa crossed her arms in front of her chest. Captain Levi had taken over Erwin's office, it was one of the biggest rooms in the Castle. The room had filing cabinets on the left side of the room, and bookshelves on the right side. The room also had a big window on the opposite wall of the room, and a desk right in front of it. Captain Levi sat there not even caring to look her way. Fire burned on her cheeks, she tried to suppress the anger that grew inside her, he wouldn't even look at her. She had spent nearly 20 minutes explaining why she would be a great addition to his office, but that had completely flown over his head._

 _"An acceptance to what exactly?" Barely even looking up from the report he was reading. However Mikasa could see that she was getting under his skin, as his hand shook with obvious annoyance._

 _Now she was assured that he had not been listening regardless she continued. "I would like to help you with your new job. Sir.I can assist you with all of this," she made a gesture towards the mess that sat on his desk. Papers upon papers, that's seemed to go on forever. "I don't have much experience but seeing the state of things around here, I'm sure I can be of some help."_

 _"I think I'm managing just fine," Levi's jaw tightened a bit as he spit out his words. His blue eyes finally looking up towards her. For some reason Mikasa body gave a small shudder when their eyes met. "If you are done Private, I would like to get back to work." He gestured towards the door, his eyes looking back to the papers in his hand._

 _"With all due respect, you have seen better days." She walked closer to him, cutting the space of the room as she came closer towards the desk. "This is a huge task and even Commander Erwin had help-"_

 _Levi got up from his seat with a loud sigh of annoyance, "Commander Erwin took all the people with a remote knowledge of this work with him." Levi retorted. It had been a low point but if Mikasa wanted him to snap into reason she would have to hit him where it hurt the most. To the captain the worst insults where those that put into question his work ethic._

 _"That is why I am offering help, sir. I am not here because of any other reason. She walked closer towards the desk. "Wall Maria knows that I would not be here if it were not to repay a debt."_

 _"You don't owe me any money, brat. So what exactly is the reason you have?" He slowly walked over to her, stoping in front of the desk and leaning back onto it. He looked slightly amused when Mikasa took a step back. She was not expecting to be faced with him so directly. The first two buttons of his buttoned up white shirt were open, and his sleeves were rolled back in a way that made him look normal. Every time she had seen him he had been wearing that Cravat thing, but this was the first time he looked so casual. His undercut was bit longer than usual, but she had to admit something about him appealed to her. "Are you just going to stare at me? Or you actually going to tell me why you are wasting my time?" He rolled his eyes._

 _"I am making quite ass out of myself, Heichou the least you could do for me is give me some respect." His expression faulted a bit, but she continued hoping that her blush would be taken as anger. "You helped me save Eren. And for that I am eternally grateful." she cleared her throat. "Because of me you are hurt. If I had not tried to kill Annie you would be fine, but I would most likely be dead. I don't know how else to pay you back. I don't have money, and I don't have access to anything that maybe of use to you. That being said I am able to offer myself." She briefly saw a smirk form on his face but she continued. "I will assist you in anything you may need."_

 _"Anything?" He gave her mischievous look, which briefly took the air from her lungs. His eyes wandering down from her face and onto her body._

 _If he wanted to play it like that then she could play as well, "Anything that you may need sir."_

 _There was a tense silence for sometime before he spoke once more, "I'll think about it."_

 _"I'm not going to take no for an answer." Mikasa repeated again her intent. "If you do not say yes now, you will say yes eventually. My advice captain is to stop wasting both our time and simply accept my proposition now so that we can get started on all that paperwork." She probably should have shut her mouth before she said her last sentence. The look Captain Levi gave her was one of disbelief and complete shock. She thought that he might kick her out of his office that instant but to her surprise he spoke once more._

 _"You know insubordination warrants a severe punishment, especially when it is aimed at your active commander." Levi continued, "Seeing as you are one of the few privates that have some sense of what you are doing, that last thing I would like to see is for you to set a bad example for others." He put his hand up to his chin, "I'll make you a deal, you can work as my assistant."_

 _Mikasa had to contain a sigh of relief, "And what is my side of the deal."_

 _"I'm getting to that part… you can be my assistant if you can tell me how you got access to my office."_

 _Her face almost dropped down to the floor. "I don't understand what you mean?" Mikasa prayed that she had heard him wrong. There was no way he would have ever known that it was her._

 _"C'mon Mikasa, how exactly am I supposed to trust you if you can even tell me something so simple…" Captain Levi smirked. "So to refresh your memory, before we had the last training my office would constantly get broken into. Strangely nothing was ever taken, but things would be misplaced or my papers would be in a different order than how I had left them. I never had the slightest idea of who that person could be, until just now."_

 _"Why? or well how?" Mikasa was caught red handed._

 _"The way you just spoke to me. No one in this entire camp would dare speak to me in the manner you just did. Mikasa Ackerman however had a grudge against me… maybe still does?"_

 _"Mikasa Ackerman would no longer do such things to her Captain." she tried to mask the complete shock she felt. "Specially now that the paperwork could mean the life or death of the entire Corps."_

 _"Her Captain huh?" Levi could not help but snicker. "How did you do it? My office was constantly locked, and when it wasn't I was in there."_

 _Mikasa cleared her throat, "The janitor would do his rounds of cleaning, every Monday, Wednesday, and Saturday. He was actually pretty punctual and you were always his last room on those days. He would get there at 7:10, clean but since you are pretty clean to begin with all he would really do was collect the trash and be out of your office at 7:15 at the latest. Then head straight to the closet leave his cleaning supplies and leave the keys to the entire castle on Hanji's desk. Of course Hanji never checked on the keys so I would just take them from her desk, create disorder in your life and then bring them back. If I felt like giving you hell I would sneak into her office on one of those days at around that time…." Mikasa sighed. "Heichou I am incredibly sorry for what I did." He was silent, almost as if he expected her to keep going. "At the time I was under the impression you just wanted to hurt Eren-"_

 _"Ahh its always about the little brat isn't it?" The captain looked annoyed once more. "Mikasa does Eren know how you feel about him?" Mikasa face fell it was an unexpected punch to the gut._

 _"Eren is the closest thing I have to family." She tried to argue but her words came out weak and soft. She did not expect to be discussing her emotions, especially not with Captain Levi._

 _"Isn't it strange to have a crush on a family member?" Levi obviously knew the she was flustered but he had no mercy on her, he just kept poking her until she would surrender. "Or maybe thats just how they do it where your from."_

 _She raised her hand and swung it towards him. Her arm was stopped by his hand instead, with all her strength she tried to pull it back but despite it all she could not shake his grip. "Let go of me." He held her arm over her head, drawing her closer to him. He was barely even trying and yet he overpowered her with ease. He spun her around still keeping a grip on her arm, but slowly moving it behind her._

 _"Is that really how you treat your superior, sweetheart?" His voice was a mixture of teasing and anger. She struggled to get free, but it was useless._

 _"This is how I treat a man who dares to insult me." She could feel her voice shaking, "All I am trying to do is help, I don't understand why you want to stop me at every step. Captain Levi, I am sure that you are incredibly capable of managing this on your own, but even greatly skilled people require help and practice at least at the beginning. If you don't want my help so be it, rot in your self-made hell. But when the Corps suffers because of your inadequacy then remember that I offered help, and you chose your pride." He released her, almost immediately she turned around to face him making sure that her body was pressed up against him. If he wanted to play the game she bring all the cards out as well. She could feel him tense up under her, and she did not care one bit. "I will not be made out to be a fool," she whispered into his ear. His face gave no expression at all, but his eyes were wide and darker than usual, he inhaled sharply. She felt his arms raise up to her waist, either to pull her off or pull her closer towards him. There was a sinking feeling in her stomach, because she almost wanted him to do the latter of the two._

 _ **Knock knock**_

 _Mikasa jumped back nearly 3 meters away from the Captain. Trying to compose herself as best she could, but inside she felt like she would burst into a million flames. It was like there was no air in the room. She turned back to see Levi, staring at her in a way that he had not ever looked at her before._

 _"What is it?" Levi practically spit it out. It was quite obvious that he had not wanted to be interrupted either._

 _"Do I have to make an appointment every time I want to see my fellow Co-Commander?" The voice of a woman echoed outside. Levi rolled his eyes and limped his way back to his seat._

 _"Come in Hanji." Without a moments hesitation she opened the door and ran inside. "What do you want now?" Levi did not even show her an ounce of respect._

 _"Why Hello Mikasa what are you doing here?" Hanji's full attention was aimed directly at her._

 _MIkasa prayed to Maria, Rose, and Cena that Hanji would not notice the full on redness of her face, or the trembling of her legs. She had truly been shaken the events that had just occurred. She was about to speak when Levi interrupted her. It was a good thing too since, she did not know what to say._

 _"Mikasa will be helping me with all of this." Levi gestured toward the pile of papers that lined the desk and the floor. "As my assistant._

 _"How ever did you convince him to get an assistant?" Now Hanji was even more interested than before, she turned once more towards Mikasa. "I have been trying to get him to that point, since we were given the job by Erwin. But you know how Levi is. Stubborn as all hell, there was no point in arguing with him. I guess I should have tried a cute brunette—"_

 _"Hanji goddamn it." Levi looked annoyed. "She is going to be my assistant, theres no need to make her feel uncomfortable." Mikasa almost chocked, from his audacity. Maybe if the last ten minutes had not happened there would be a chance of it not being awkward, but simple words would not even phase her now._

 _Hanji winked at Mikasa. "Well if you get this man some sleep, I will be forever thankful to you."_

 _"Trust me, the Captain's well being is all that I want." Mikasa gave her a brief smile, but as soon as Hanji turned back to face Levi, Mikasa rolled her eyes. She made sure that Levi saw her do it._

 _"That is very sweet of you Mikasa. Seeing as we are done here, I expect you to be here tomorrow at 500 sharp." Now she would have to wake up nearly 2 hours before everyone else, she almost wanted to kick herself for having the stupid idea of begging him to accept her help. He was definitely going to make life harder for her, and there was nothing she could do to help it._

 _With a fake smile she said, "Most definitely. Sir." With that she saluted them and left as best she could._


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi there everyone. Thanks for reading. I apologize for it being so late, I've had a lot of HW and end of semester class work that I've had to finish. I will try to publish a new chapter at least every week though. Believe it or not I actually wrote about 50 pages worth of the this story, last year. And I lost it somehow off my computer so I've had to go back and rewrite everything. I'm making sure though to publish everything as I go so that I don't lose it like I did before. Anyways here's the story, hope y'all enjoy.**

 _Her body adjusted to her new schedule as best it could seeing that Levi not only expected her to be up and ungodly hours and then not allowing her to leave until way past 2300. She would be lucky if she slept over 4 hours a night, it was cruel and mean but she wouldn't let him scare her off that easily. Over the period of 3 weeks Mikasa and Levi caught up on all the late reports and orders, but unavoidably they spent entire days together in his office. There was obvious sexual tension (as well as something else) blooming inside both of them. Since the first day she had been in his office, thoughts of him only became sexual. There were days were all she wanted was to rip his head off, but then there were other days were she just wanted to rip his clothes off. Maybe it was the lack of sleep or maybe it was something else, but as the days progressed she found herself having the same type of day-dream. The ones that involved the captain with her tongue down his throat, as she pealed away each layer clothing from his body. Dreams that were certainly not appropriate for her to have, especially for a man who ranked above her and was significantly older than her. Sometimes she would catch him staring at her and she wondered if he could read her thoughts. It was like a secret she was hiding and the mere thought of him finding out the sex crazed thoughts she had for him, made her blush red._

 _This new job had completely withdrawn her from her friends and comrades, and maybe that could explain why she felt the need to know the person whom she was spending her days with. He was mysterious to her, and might have added to sex appeal that she was so painfully aware of. But slowly Levi opened up to her or as open as he could get. He gave her some hints about what he used to do before the Scouts. To her surprise he was also an orphan like she was, who only joined the military because of another person. In his case it had been because of Erwin, but she related entirely. Likewise Mikasa let him in as well, giving him insight to some of her past, but still guarding herself behind the walls she had built for herself long ago. It was strange that only a few months before Mikasa hated this man with eternal passion, but yet there she was spending entire weeks with him. Telling him her thoughts, and discussing ambitions for the future._

 _After they had caught up with all of the paper work Mikasa wondered if her days as his assistant would be numbered. Soon he would not need her anymore, and strangely she hoped that the day would never come. She was shocked to feel that way, but she gave up trying to fight something that she could not avoid. Mikasa liked spending time with Levi, in fact she could think of no better way of spending her days. Yes it was often boring and repetitive, but she lived for the brief moments where he would touch her. Or when she would catch him staring and he would try to play it off cooly. Coming into work became less of chore and more of a privilege for her. Not to mention it beat training, or trying to talk to Eren who only ignored her. Yes, she missed spending time with her friends but she felt the most useful here with the Captain. The office that only garnered her hate at first, was now like a second home to her. She probably spent more time here, than even in her own room. She barely even saw her roommate, Sasha._

 _Then one day Levi did something unexpected, he told her to come in later than normal._

 _"Why?" Mikasa felt her gut drop down the floor._

 _"Seeing as we are caught up and we have basically gotten through next week's orders, there's really no need for me to keep you around Mikasa." Levi studied her reaction as if expecting her to react a certain way._

 _"Okay then," She would not let him see her cry, but the truth was that she could feel tears beginning to form. It was silly and stupid but she felt as if he was kicking her out. Frankly Mikasa could not figure out why she was so upset, but she was. "Should I just leave now, you know since we are done."_

 _A look must have given her away, because Levi looked surprised to see her reaction, at the news she could regain her freedom. "Mikasa… I thought that this is what you wanted. I think you have done more than enough of your share."_

 _"Captain, its fine. If I am no use to you, I understand. There is no need for hard feelings, Correct?" She averted her eyes from him, the tears were coming and she needed to leave as fast as possible. It was silly for her to cry at something so stupid, he was not dying nor was she. However she did not want to loose the friend she had gained, or the attraction that she thought she had for him. As soon as she stepped through the door of his office, all the time they had spent together would cease to exist. It would be like the way it had been before, and that was the last thing she wanted._

 _Levi got up from his chair, slowly walking towards her. "You are useful to me, just not here anymore." He kneeled down, softly taking her chin into his hand, and moving it back to his face. "I cant make up work for you to do, there just isn't anymore for us to do." His blue eyes stared into her dark gray ones._

 _It felt like a cowardly goodbye. Like he was pushing her away before things got out hand. That simply would not satisfy the feeling that was slowly choking the life out of her. Without even thinking Mikasa leaned forward planting a kiss on his lips. She closed her eyes, expecting him to push her away at any moment. It wasn't like she didn't get enough experience with rejection from Eren, but if she did not do something she knew she would regret it later on. Strangely the Captain did not push her off, instead she felt him take in a shocked breath, and then kiss her back. His lips were soft and tasted sweet and minty. Her arms wrapped around his neck bringing him in closer, his breaths became shorter and deeper as the kiss continued. He lifted himself up from the floor and she remained glued to his lips. His hand reached down for small of her back as he leaned against the desk behind him, he pressed her body closer to his. She could feel him, and how much he wanted her. Hands moved from the small of her back, down her butt, pressing himself more against her, a feeling of desire overtaking her senses. She wanted him now. Her lips moved down his neck, decorating it with small kisses, as she slowly moved down to undo his cravat, and open his shirt. Her hand reached down from his neck onto the damned cravat the she was so desperate to take off, his hands grabbed both her wrists stopping her from continuing._

 _"You sure about this?" Levi said almost out of breath. His eyes a serious demeanor, as his hands still grasped her ass tightly._

 _"What you don't want to?" Mikasa could feel an onset of rejection, the pain at this point would be quite traumatic._

 _A smile appeared on his face and Levi laughed, "Are you kidding I want this more than anything." His fingers pulled some hair back away from her face. "But do you want this?"_

 _"Yes," Mikasa quickly answered anxious to get back to touching him. Her hands began to go back to the cravat but he stopped her once again._

 _"This was definitely not how I imagined it would happen?" He chuckled._

 _"Are you done?" Mikasa was growing increasingly more frustrated she wanted him, and she wanted him now. Could he not understand?_

 _"Okay. Okay. Ouch you would think I took away your favorite toy or something." Levi smirked. "I just thought you might want something else, I don't know maybe something that wasn't Erwin's office."_

 _Mikasa's cheeks burned. "You know what Levi, now that you mention it. I always imagined that I would lose my virginity on top of a unicorn in the middle of a forrest. You think you can make that happen?"_

 _Levi choked with the revelation. "Having sex on a horse would be difficult, not to mention if it is moving through a forrest. But if your into that we can make it work in the future"_

 _"I believe I said unicorn" Mikasa corrected him, if he was going to recreate this ridiculous fantasy he might as well get it right._

 _"Right… how about just hear me out… we have sex. In my room." Levi tried to insist on it._

 _"Or we can just stay here and you can fuck me up against this desk, or that wall," she pointed at the left wall. "Or maybe there—" Levi silenced her with a kiss, only releasing her after he was sure she was breathless._

 _To be honest her ideal place to lose her virginity, wouldn't have been Erwin's office either. It was sweet of Levi, to try to make it special though. However trivial items such as a virginity would do her of no use, and losing it in "special place" would not do change the fact that she was becoming sexually active. Although women in the interior we ofter revered for being virgins on their wedding nights, it was the last thing that had ever crossed her mind. She was not planning on getting married anytime soon, and frankly the whole concept of a virgin wedding night bored her. If she was ever getting married, she wanted a man who she knew could satisfy the need she craved. The only one she had been willing to wait for was Eren, but seeing as that would never be a possibility she was not worried about this at all._

 _"Let me close the window then. The last thing we need is for the other brats to find out" Levi ran to the curtains and shut them with a force that only revealed his enthusiasm. Mikasa pounced on him the second his hand left the cloth. "I'll have to make it up to Erwin somehow." Mikasa pulled him down onto the floor and then straddled him._

 _"Make it up to him, from both of us" she giggled._

 _Mikasa mouth attacked him all over with her mouth and hands. Greedily grabbing the cravat and undoing as fast as her hands would let her. It was like she was unwrapping a handsome present. She loved every second of it, removing his shirt, then unbuckling his belt. His hands wandered to her own clothing and she could tell that he also was desperate to see her. He removed her jacket then her shirt, all that were left were the bandages that covered her breasts, and her pants. Slowly Levi unbuckled her pants removing them slowly, and she did the same. His enormous bulge stuck out from his boxers. Mikasa teased him by rubbing herself against it. She heard him bite back a moan, his hands reached out for her underwear pulling it down her legs and throwing them behind them. She was practically naked except for the bands._

 _"You're beautiful." Levi smiled up from under her, pulling her down so that he could kiss her once again. It was a sweet kiss that Mikasa cut short by pulling off the bands allowing her breasts to be freed. While also removing his boxers. She spread her legs and slowly lowered herself onto his cock. It was bigger than she had anticipated, and she took a deep breath before she raised herself once more. The man under her was going insane with her every move. She lowered herself once more. Levi hands moved to her waist and even though she was supposed to be in control, somehow he was the one that was calling the shots. He raised her up and down, erasing any trace of pain that initially struck her. Moving her up and down until she could feel the same pleasure that he felt. She was wetter with every touch he placed upon her, "Mikasa…god." He groaned but still maintained the rhythm that was driving her nuts. She could feel a climax to all of this pleasure, her moans became louder and louder until she thought it could not get any better but with every stroke she felt closer and closer to something._

 _"Levi, I'm… I'm" She could not make out the words._

 _"I know, you're close. I can feel that sweet pussy clamping down on my dick." Levi could barely even make out the words through his short breaths. Even so his words sent chills down her spine, he had never spoken to her so… dirty. It was hot._

 _She violently climaxed her body jolting in a way it had never done before. Levi kept going until a few seconds later he joined her in Nirvana. Mikasa could feel his cock inside her, jerking around as his seed dispersed itself inside her. Mikasa out of breath and tired collapsed on top of him. For a while they did not move or say anything to one another, he was still inside her. Choosing to stay quiet with the only exception being their breathing. The earth stopped moving for quite some time it seamed, until finally Mikasa spoke up._

 _"That was great…" She said her head still on his chest and his hand caressed her back carefully._

 _"We probably should have warmed you before that though." Levi suggested. "You are going to be sore tomorrow."_

 _"Sore?" Mikasa head perked up. Looking at the man who had just taken her virginity, and made her feel more spirituality through that orgasm, than she ever felt in her entire life. His hair was messed up, and beads of sweat formed on his forehead. He was beautiful, and all she could have wished for and more._

 _"Yeah, sore. Tomorrow when you wake up, you are going to wish you never kissed me." Levi pulled back her hair from her forehead._

 _"I doubt that," Mikasa planted a kiss on his chest, her eyes looking back it him. "Did you… uh?"_

 _"Enjoy it?" Levi's eyebrow raised up. "Is the sky blue?" He looked at her as if he expected a response. When she did not answer he continued, "Of course I enjoyed it. I had sex with the most beautiful woman I know." Levi laughed. Mikasa blushed because she had never felt as beautiful as he was making her feel._

 _"Thank you, Levi"_


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you for reading. We are still in Mikasa's flashback, but hopefully soon we can make it to the present. I find it hard though because I want to develop their relationship more, but it is important to get there. Anyways here's the story enjoy.**

 _At first she expected it to only go one for a few weeks, weeks turned into months and still they were inseparable. Mikasa and Levi became closer than she had ever hoped. It was codependency that crippled her thoughts each night because the end result would not end well for either of them. Initially she had suspected that this relationship would be a sex-only type of affair. And that it would cease to exist as soon as they could no longer stand each other. Each night and each orgasm only made her become more attached to the man she had once hated. In a way it was nice to have the rush of love coursing through her veins, but this was not a good idea in the long run. She knew that any feelings that may result from their fucking would just have to be put aside, ignored or killed. For the longest time she refused to acknowledge the very real emotions she had developed, choosing instead to try to wean herself from him. This task was not something she had success in. As every invitation or seduction would result in her giving in entirely, he wouldn't even have try one bit to convince her. However one could not escape the truth of their realities as soldiers (not just regular soldier's some of humanity's strongest), they could never be together. Especially not in the way she found herself more frequently dreaming about. Their life as soldiers would never allow them to live in a way that would be remotely either one left it would be a major loss to the Corps, never mind if they both left. It was a tragedy but it was their reality. Their selfishness could severely impact their friends and comrades, so running away was never a viable option_

 _It scared her how much she needed him, days that were spent apart only tore holes into her heart. Likewise the man could never get enough of her. Always asking her to stay later, or frequently dragging her into his room for some late night fun. Although Mikasa refused to admit it, she found herself falling deeper and deeper into a hole that she knew could never be real. As her feelings became more intense the longer they continued their arrangement. She came to the conclusion, that she would be with him as long as he would let her. The constant threat of death made each moment spent with one another more special than the last. She would protect him, she would love him, and she would trust him until he gave her a reason not to._

 _Soon Erwin returned back as Commander, and effectively relieved Levi and Hanji from his position. Levi made something up about still needing Mikasa's assistance, and somehow he got it approved. Mikasa would no longer assist on a daily basis however, instead it was more of a weekly thing since Levi did not have nearly as much workload as before. Still she appreciated the lengths he went to in order to keep her near him, but the end result would be that they could no longer spend the same amount of time together. Before they could use the excuse that they were working on reports or paperwork, as the reason for her staying up so late and missing her training (although Levi trained her in other ways). It was not like they could make their relationship known to all of the Corps. It was highly inappropriate and it could result on some major backlash, for both of them. A high ranking officer was not supposed to be involved with a mere cadet, much less one that was supposed to be his assistant. That was not to say that it hadn't happened before in the Corps, but even those times had resulted in serious repercussions for the parties involved. If she had learned anything, the Corps was always looking for the next scandal, like vultures looking for their next meal. She could deal with the fallouts, or at least she thought she would be able to. On the other hand she would never be able to forgive herself for what such gossip would do to Levi. The last thing she ever wanted was to be a smear on his prestigious name. Instead Mikasa had realistic expectations for what this relationship could result in. She never bombarded him with ultimatums or threats because she knew that his hands were tied. Levi like her could not do with his life as he wanted. They never spoke about revealing this thing that they were doing, because it had no point; But as the months progressed it became harder for them to deny that it was not becoming more serious._

 _Mikasa returned to her previous life as a soldier, but deep down she feared that this separation could result in the loss of her Captain. It was a paranoid thought with little to no basis, but after Eren withdrawn attitude towards her feared the worst. Levi was one to withdraw and retreat into himself. After all these months she and him had come a long way, and she would be damned if he was going to hide himself from her. The captain surprised her by becoming more and more affectionate. At times even in front of other comrades._

 _After months of basically being separated from her friends, it was nice to be back with them. Yes, she loved spending time with the Captain but she had missed her friends in that time. Now that she was back with her crew, the familiarity of home came back to her. They all were delighted to have her back, specially Jean. She knew of the poor boy's feelings, but after Levi she knew that it would never happen. Jean loved her in a way that she was all to familiar with, as she too faced the same unrequited love that he felt. Sure she was fucking the man she loved every other night but the insecurity inside her only pushed her to believe that it was only until he got tired of her. She never accused him of that but it was fear that she hoped would never become a reality._

 _"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?" Mikasa slammed the door shut, and threw her jacket onto the floor in frustration. But the stubborn brute would not even dare to look her way, instead he kept walking into his bedroom._

 _Mikasa huffed and clenched her fists in frustration, Levi could be such a passive aggressive asshole when he wanted to be. "You know exactly what I mean." She could barely hear him from the other room. It was a good thing that his apartment resided on one of the empty sections of the Castle. Otherwise their constant bickering or their loud sex would have given them away to the entire corps long ago. It was not the biggest of apartments, but it was at least five times bigger than her room. When you walked in there was a small kitchen on the left and in front was a living room (which almost no other soldiers had), then past the kitchen was his bedroom and his private bathroom._

 _She threw her hands up at the air trying to decipher the meaning behind his words. "I don't know what you mean," she ran into his room planning to give him a piece of her mind. Her hand pushed the door open to reveal him in halfway undressed. Still he proceeded to take off his belt not even acknowledging her presence. "Hey I'm talking to you." Mikasa walked up to him._

 _"Why don't you go talk to Jean or maybe Eren." Levi pulled off his boots carefully putting them aside by the bed. "Maybe they can be of better company." Mikasa could barely even recognize the words._

 _"Excuse me?" She was shocked at such request, this was definitely not like him at all. "What exactly is that supposed to mean."_

 _"I saw you tonight" his blue eyes still looking in another direction._

 _"And what exactly did you see?" Before he could answer she just had to ask the question that her brain kept wanting to ask. "Are you… Are you Jealous or something." A small grin appearing on her mouth, just the thought a grown man like Levi would ever be jealous of two boys made her laugh._

 _"Ha, jealous of those two." Levi gave a fake laugh. "Never."_

 _"Then I don't understand what exactly is the issue here." Mikasa was both confused and completely taken aback by her Captain's reaction. She tried to think back to what they had been previously doing. As far she knew it was a pretty normal day, she ate lunch, went on a small hike with Sasha, and then did some training with Armin, Eren and Jean. It was nothing out of the ordinary. "Did I do something to piss you off?"_

 _Levi looked quite annoyed at this point, and he looked up at her with glare. Those blue eyes could have pierced holes in her with the anger they possessed. "How about not letting other guys touch you, that aren't me."_

 _So he was jealous, "It was training. If anything I won most of those matches so they barely even touched me." Mikasa tried to bite back the laughter that was rising in the pit of her gut. This was ridiculous, Levi didn't have any reason to be mad at her. Much less because of Jean and Eren. It was too much and she let out a small chuckle._

 _"Didn't look like much training, especially with the way that they were both looking at you."_

 _"That might be because you are a perv." She paused trying not laugh. "Did it ever occur to you that maybe they were looking at me because were all trying to beat each other. I know that you know how fights go you need to be able to see your opponent, so don't try to pin some fantasy up like a reality Levi"_

 _"You think my fantasy is to see you get fucked by other men?" Levi finally walked towards her, shirtless, and hunger looming in his eyes. "Mikasa Ackerman you are mine, and mine only." As he came closer Mikasa took some steps back until she hit a wall, but he kept walking and cornering her until she only faced him. She was pinned between his body and the wall. "Nobody gets to touch my girlfriend except for me" He hand moved onto her hip and up her side, but she could barely even feel it. The moment he had said girlfriend, her heart skipped a beat and she felt like she could not breathe. So It wasn't just sex to him, it was more than that. Mikasa armed reached for his neck pulling him towards her lips. It was soft at first but became needier with each passing moment. For a brief moment she contemplated never letting him go, but she needed to know if it wasn't all just in her head._

 _"Did you say girlfriend?" Mikasa barely uttered as she tried to make out the words. She felt as his hold briefly released her and his lips moved away._

 _He looked back at her with bewilderment, as if he could not form the words. Confusion was all that Mikasa could gather. "Yes?" He looked hurt for a bit, "Isn't that what we are doing here, babe. Building a relationship?"_

 _"I thought that it wasn't what you wanted… A serious relationship, that is." her words were soft but uncertain. It wouldn't have killed her if her asserted that he was only in it for the sex, it would have hurt, but she could live with it. However she would be ecstatic if he finally gave her the answer she desired._

 _"Mikasa, I love you more than anything else I have loved in this world," Mikasa nearly choked, she wasn't expecting that. Never in her dreams would she have expected that. Levi loved her, and he was practically confessing it to her._

 _"I…" words were to hard for her to make out at the moment._

 _"That might have been to rash," Levi pushed his hair back from his face. "I haven't said it but I can't deny that it is true, and its been true for sometime now."_

 _"I…" again the words were caught in her throat._

 _"It's okay if you don't feel the same way. I understand that its a lot to take in at once but-"_

 _"-Levi please shut up." She rushed to him, and pushed him down onto the bed. Her lips landing a firm kiss on his before she said "I love you too. But you can be a real ass sometimes."_


End file.
